Pete Zaroll sat down with Favorited Comedian winner Carlos Delgado for some hard-hitting questions.
Carlos Delgado, winner of the Totino’s + Nerdist Favorited Comedian contest, graciously sat down with a Pizza Roll in a wizard costume at Comic-Con International in San Diego this weekend and answered some extremely serious and extremely important questions.
PETE: Hey Carlos, how do you like my costume?
CARLOS: Hey Pete, I think it’s really really cute and I’m really impressed by your craftsmanship. Or…craftspersonship.
PETE: Thank you for respecting me like that. How comfy are you right now? Do you need a pillow or something?
CARLOS: Yes. Possibly could I use you as a pillow? Because not only do you give me comfort through food, but also through your presence.
PETE: And also I’m a very tiny pillow-shaped food item.
CARLOS: Yes, you are.
PETE: Carlos, who’s your favorite comedian whom you might also be kind of afraid of meeting in a dark alley?
CARLOS: Wow…that’s really political. I think my favorite comedian but that I might also be afraid of meeting in a dark alley is Jackie Kashian. She’s one of my favorite comedians, but if I met her in a dark alley, I’d be more scared of why she’s in a dark alley.
PETE: Ooooh, for sneaky things!
CARLOS: Yeah, like, why are you here?
PETE: Who would win in a fight: A hundred Pizza Roll-sized horses, or one horse-sized Pizza Roll?
CARLOS: I think you have to go to the Greeks in terms of that, and I’m going to say Trojan Horse method. More Pizza Rolls, more battle, more win.
PETE: But the Trojans…there was one giant horse!
CARLOS: Yes but inside of the horse…
PETE: So what you’re saying is that the Mechabattle would be the horse-sized Pizza Roll filled with tiny Pizza Roll-sized Horses?
CARLOS: It’s the only way for assured victory.
PETE: I like your thinking. Have you ever been to Cleveland? Why or why not?
CARLOS: I have not been to Cleveland because I have not been able to get a show there. But I would love to go to Cleveland!
PETE: On a scale from one million to one billion, how much do you love pizza?
CARLOS: Oh, I’m going to say like a cold hard one billion.
PETE: A solid one billion?
CARLOS: Solid one billion. I love pizza.
PETE: So if we reduce our fractions and go lowest common denominator, it’s like a ten.
CARLOS: I’d like to say ten out of ten, yes.
PETE: Great. If you had to tattoo one planet on your body, which would you choose and where would you put it?
CARLOS: I would pick Uranus, but I would put it on my forehead.